Repeat

Shadwos play on my wall Some mystic dream of you on all fours My favourite imagining rhyme Now one step out of time And killers are us for wasting our time No sense to acheive No room for defeat The world does not blink We're out on our own With no dollar or dime The kitchen is undressed and my bed is a mess One cruel blow for stepping out of line Thoughts circle my head Blood splashed on my bed And I couldn't resist Temptation still exists My heart is heavy My palms are sweaty But I would do all of this again

All Isn't Love

I have re-lived the past in fine detail and welcomed ghosts to my door Let them in and let them drink my tea I have tried and tried to move on but your face is inscribed into my mind Like an imprint of some kind I have tried to reject every plea my mind has made I still am each day It isn’t easy without you in my life and so I found Seeing you each day shifts my pulse up and down Most of all I miss you Like you could never imagine Let me be your friend Your best friend

Gold Medal

Am I made from cardboard? Either way I still crumble I cry Therefore, I’m not a man Emotions are not taught You desired me then derided me In the space of a millisecond and that must be an Olympic record I am not strong as you So I’m a lesser person I’m a broken bottle My edges point outwards for all to see For all to laugh In the dark corridor of your mind You’ll see in time I’m the person you like

Darkest Glance

The darkest glance I ever saw The sweet taste Of another day Another hour Time passes so slow Brutal like the snow Ignorance is never bliss And I can’t ignore this I have found Lost Found Lost In one month I went Dragging my heels To the floor Crying some more Under these bedsheets I can be happy Outside the door I can’t make it Each crippling defeat Knocks me for six Each sound Shatters me in two

'Forever'

Sick Now angst Frivolity catches up with me You are the joy to behold from me you'll receive me and me I can't conceive The inner workings of your weird little mind Now time has written off the debt you owe I'm stuck between the pillar and the sky Forever waiting Forever hoping

The Place

In the darkness you're my lantern
The storm for all my vices
You glittering now amongst the stars
To hold you in my arms

Your every way is scenic
Like the countryside
That smile in your eyes
Like fresh wind on a cloudless day

The gloom is wiped aweay by your charm
That flashes forth in abundance
And I am yours
You are mine

It's enough that even your appearance
Restores joy to my heart
but your eyes are precious secrets
Handsome like empty lockets

The sun blackened the candles of the night
And you did the same
You conquered me

My dreams are hopeless
We're all waiting for you
Only you

The Sea

You scare me as churches do
You owl in your damned heart
Those mornings
Those evenings
Your De Profoundis echoed in response

I hate you!
Your great highs and lows
I see them in my soul
You're full of insults and sobs
I hear them roar within me

But how you please me
Under these stars
Your light speaks a language
I've never known
Since I seek the blank, the bare

But the darkness is a screen
Where thousands are protected from my eyes
All those vanished beings
I never knew

Anna Gavalda

I am a sadder man than most
A better man than most
I have lifed a life that's empty
Yet to be fulfilled

I am a happy man
If a lonely man
I'm a desperate man
In debt by two grand

Blood has turned to stone
Tears to bone
A gesture of words
Won't bring me home

The Cocteau Twins
Sing to me
Not to you

Anna Gavalda
Doesn't write for you
She writes for me
Only me

David Lynch
Doesn't exist in your world
He exists in mine
Only mine

Tesco Toilet

I fucked you in your Sisters room
Then we had tea with your parents

You cut my wrists
Then we held hands along the beach

I put my fingers in you on a cold November day
Then we shared a hot choclate at the Christmas markets

In Paris, I put my arm around you
And bought you the prettiest shoes

We screwed in Tesco toilets
and struggled to make ends meet

I used to read you Oscar Wilde
Until you stabbed me in the back

I never told you but I loved you
You never told me but you hated me too

Blue Checked Shirt

Fragments of my imagination
Were splattered all over your bed
A simple case of over indulgence

You in my blue checked shirt
With a lump in your throat
Me with a stupid grin
Not knowing what year it was

My never ending hopes were dashed
Because me and your Dad clashed

You make me cry when you're sad
I live in a dream
What all of the things you could have had?

Moon

The moon is a constant torch
Etched in the blankness
You are a shadow
Never yourself

The moon illuminates us
Whilst you destroy yourself
The moon is looking at me
Whilst you turn away from me

The moon is still
Whilst you wriggle, scratch and stare
What would I be without you?

It's anyones guess
Just an empty hole....where no light ever comes

The Last Goodbye - Part 2

It's the last goodbye I swear
I can't get by
On a love that doesn't go anywhere

I've been losing so long
I stopped dreaming
How long must this go on?

All the times I held you
I seem to think a lot
About all the things I forgot

I'll cry for someone else
How long must I search for something that is not lost?
I'll search at any cost

I heard all you said
But if I can save you anytime

I won't forget I swear
The past is behind me

Seperation

As I fell into unconsciousness
I fell into a deep well
I waved goodbye to the world

Your face stays imprinted in my mind
And I'll never forget you

I have lapsed into the dark
You'll never find me

I am not yours
You are not mine
But i still adore you
Like i did before

Our souls have sepearated
The parting of the sea
My favourite love
I'll never see

You whispered to me
Words I can't repeat
There you left me to my retreat

Every scene I've ever lived
Has flashed in front of my eyes
I'm like a passenger of a ghost train
Observing my errors

Lost 4 EVA

Hiding behind the bathroom door
I couldn't give you anymore

Cinema

The leaves have fallen
My body broken
No money to pay
No will to claim

Choices are confused
Blurred between rusty walls
Words scrawled on my celing
In permanent marker

Your skirt is over your head
Why is this?
Your spine is buckled
Why is this?

My dreams are draped over your shoulder
A barren sense of light
Diminish my returns
Damage my plight

Sat alone in the cinema
You sit and stare
Seeing yourself on the screen
Seeing me too

Don’t retract now
Only protract
The time you have left is precious
And so am I

Christmas

Celebrations for nothing
Time eases the pain
The memory
And the shame

Decorations for nothing
A rotten taste in my mouth
A soothing taste
Gone to waste

Desperation for nothing
Clinging to hope
With a broken rope
You are a joke

Tears for everything
A water park
Drowned by yourself
Lost in the dark

Bad Book

You bring out the best in me
You bring out the worse in me
But most of all you bring the boredom out of me
I am happy and alone

You covered up everything
Including your mind
And you clouded mine

I’m always in your debt
But I don’t owe you anything
Everything is borrowed
And most things I forget

Envy drowns your eyes
You’re so easy to read
Like a bad book
From you nothing I took

Detection

From the highs to the lows
To the knees to the toes
From the floor to the sky
From the when to the why

From the heights to the depths
From tears you gave me I wept
From the troubles to the joy
You were beautiful and coy

From your ripped pink towel
To the sex and that howl
You were NEVER mine
You were ALWAYS mine