Big Wave

I sit in my car in the Northern Quarter

'Big Wave' is on endlessly and it's dark

Past midnight

I listen as she tells me I am weird

How I weird people out all the time

Without realising I am hunched over

Almost hugging the steering wheel

As if to brace

I  continue to listen to her

Listing my faults like a shopping list

Further down the street a man shouts

'I love you, I love you, I love you'

As bottles are dropped and smashed into an industrial size bin

The windows are misted and it's October so it's cold

She says, 'I don't mind it, I like you for being weird'

But it's hard to listen

I don't want to go to these places

Where I sit on the edge of peoples conversations

Feeling awkward and not fitting in

Being told afterwards that people mention how weird I am

I realise now I am hugging the steering wheel

I adjust myself

I make a joke about it and wonder if this is weird

We talk about other things and laugh

But it's late

I want to go home

The door thuds as she leaves the car